Sleeping Beauty

Sleep as important as it is to me; a drug to my tiring physique, a nurturer to my mind and a temporary escape from this world, it's also a burden of sleepless anxieties of falling asleep if you know what I mean. The expectation of 'sleep' is in itself tiring, knowing that you HAVE to sleep rather than naturally fall sleep and wake up automatically. The multiple awakenings, the annoying movements and the awareness of each and every sound...whether it's your next door neighbor turning on the TV whose living room happens to be next to your bedroom, separating the two families with a mere thin wooden wall. One can't even say 'brick wall'.


I'd prefer to move away in a house with no boundaries...no walls, where sounds of mine echo back my familiar self. Where disturbance is only of the wind blowing, the stars gazing and the birds chirping. Where an endless sea of tulips, roses and dahlias welcome me as I open the door to my master balcony, looking down upon my flowery servants, full of fragrance and color. While the morning breeze touches my cheeks like a morning kiss that elates my soul and gives me encouragement to wake up...rise and shine!

Sleep. No wonder the word 'sheep' is so close to sleep.
I also wonder how many sheep it takes to fall asleep. Never done that.
Maybe the elongation of "ee" in sleep and sheep makes the word sound soothing and therefore boring. Like the science behind "Ohm", the more you say it in meditation, repeating this mantra over and over again, the more peaceful you feel with your inner-self.
Emphasizing the Oooo= opening your mouth....HHHH= breathing deeply and MMMM= trying to reach the very core of your soul.

For some reason, sleep in all its mystery and magic, has many times taken place in fairy tales. What was snow white thinking when she was put to eternal sleep to never wake up until the prince kissed her out of unconsciousness? The magic behind not knowing of what overcame her and in what state she was in, made it even more exciting to see her waking up in the arms of the handsome prince.

A sleep that was so beautifully manufactured, without any imperfections. Her lips as red as the apple, her hair neatly tied around a hair band, and her perfect posture that made her look like an angel and ready to be seen. What'd she do? Brush her teeth before the scene?

If we consider ourselves sleeping beauties we may wake up looking like one! At the end some of us may not be greeted by a prince who has traveled distances just to see your beautiful face in the morning. You see, snow white was lucky to have had such high praise about her beauty that left royalty wanting to see her. Walls should be broken...all barriers should be taken away....maybe the jungle will do some justice to us girls, so that praise/admiration can reach the seven dwarfs resulting into a world wide chase of 'natural beauty'. Real natural, I say. ;)

If beauty sleep can restore criticism about ourselves, if it can restore and fix me being too much reliable on all the beauty products that are readily available on my dresser, then I will, without any doubt, sleep like sleeping beauty and wake up like snow white...if not in the arms of a prince (for the hopeful), then waking up knowing that sleep has converted the "uselessness" of our human bodies for an estimate of 8 hours, into something everlasting;

A youthful and radiant appearance!
Sleep well! :)

Death, an inevitable circle of life.

Life and death, a very realistic part of living in this world and the one very fatal condition we are aware of; knowing that one day our breath will give up on us, our heart will stop working and we'll be forced to make our way into another dimension, a dimension that is unknown to our existence, but understood by many religions as a reward and last resort for the good and the bad.

For many, this ultimatum makes them strive to become a better human being and for others it may be a fear factor, ignoring their sins until death itself faces them in the eye. Some may realize and turn their 'left-over' life around or some still stay oblivious to this fact thats written in stone and cannot be erased. Does this mean that the ignorant amongst us are living life to the fullest without fear and consequences? Or does it mean that the faithful, knowing the outcome of their deeds, lead a more harmonious and balanced life? What is what and what's not, is a personal
belief of every individual as long as he/she leaves earth with a satisfaction of complete and utter surrender to whom we may believe in.

Bucket list, a movie that I saw lately, ingeniously written and directed, shows exactly my point I am trying to make here. More than a certain 'point', its rather an analysis of what I think of life and death and the road in between called, living. We all live under one roof so to speak, made of endless skies of rain, heat, cold, snow or drought. Nevertheless, the same universe that offers us a home to stay, also comes with its cruelties to challenge mankind of civilization.
Cruelties such as poverty, tragedies, death, diseases, abnormalities, and many other misfortunes are offered to us in a package; a home loan consisting of adjustable "rates", swirling our fates into the ups and downs while making us pay a humongous payment laid on a fat bracket of interest.

The beauty of living lies in the tools that are already granted to us; such as our eyes to see, our ears to listen, our hearts to give and receive love and our mouths to speak. We are the product of ourselves and yet we ignore to see the goods that are given to us for free, without any charge. We always seek to want more, the best of the best, arriving at number one and nothing less or else we'd be disappointed, depressed, and let down by ourselves and others! God forbid we show some sort of weakness...we are an army of soldiers marching towards success over and over again, stomping and pushing our gigantic feet to get to the other end !!!....

Success to me is finding a middle ground between materialistic, financial freedom and spiritual enjoyment/enhancement of life...whether through community or family, through charity or kindness, through faith or humility; there HAS to be a middle ground that completes the full picture of your JOY, of your SATISFACTION out of life. Once accomplished, forever peaceful.

Maybe wisdom isn't only grown by age but also by character. Death, so inevitable...perfect in its own way; without explanations or excuses, visits generations of generations without a knock on the door or an invite to consider, striking us all in one single blow.

May we be among those who are fortunate to see the yin from the yang, the clear from the gray, the glass full from the half, the seen from the unseen and most importantly, the known from the unknown.

This reminds me of the beautiful song by Elton John; "Circle of life" where the King of the lions, King Mufasa, is holding Simba high up in the sky and subsequently loses himself through an unfortunate twist of fate, leaving Simba and his Kingdom in a dark place, until the new King arises...stepping into the throne of his father, fighting against all enemies and all odds, claiming his royal position and restoring his home to continue the circle of life when at the end holding his own son, his heir and pride for the future - a majestic story that still leaves me in awe.
Whether it be the animal kingdom or the human race; pride, love, ancestry, and continuation of life is seen in any form.


It's all a matter of life vs. death and at the end, the joys in between, right? :)

My 7th Heaven: 2007

As we have left 2007 behind us, 2008 just seems like a number alone, digits that we haven't put any meaning to yet. Memories are still to be made within this new year as we cherish the memories, the beautiful or not so beautiful moments of last year.

2007 was in many ways a very blissful and exciting year for me. I got married in March and marriage has since then really suited me! I couldn't have been happier. :) Life has taken a total new twist within last year's journey and now that I look back, I feel like a more accomplished human being than ever before. I feel content and I am satisfied with all I have, but the eagerness of having the best in life still burns as a spark within me. Perhaps that's the energy that makes me...ME. :)

I have just come back from a nice vacation at my parental home in California. My flight to Oakland, California was late afternoon, but we left early in order to avoid traffic. I arrived at a good time and had enough time to grab a sandwich and catch up on my reading.
My flight went smoothly and I couldn't wait to see my sister! The airport was crowded due to the holidays, but when I finally saw Madiha running towards me I couldn't help but squeal out of joy. Our relationship is such, that we are more like 'twin sisters' than just regular sisters. I immediately felt like I embraced my replica, thus my lovely sister Madiha. The drive didn't seem that long since we were talking away, about everything; her life, my life, her studies, my studies etc. She said I looked very good and that my face was glowing and that my hair was silkier than ever. I of course referred her to the new hair products that I have started using lately. It's so much fun to just talk about these things and know that she puts the same importance on the things that I do, nothing has really changed! :) When making new friends, its often hard to talk about the little specifics right away, since a relationship is still about to be established, but a sisterly bond requires no formalities, no hesitance whatsoever. :)
Ammi Jaan (my mom) was eagerly waiting for me and my little brother, Sammer, was assigned to call us and inquire as to where we were on the road to parental home sweet home :)

Seeing Ammi and the warmth she carries with her made me really feel like a kid again. Running towards my mom happily and hugging her tightly felt secure and so sweet. My mom had all my favorite meals ready and the house was as beautiful as ever.

Nabeel and Sammer couldn't help but make sarcastic comments, haha, like all brothers do and I immediately felt a part of their clan. The coolness that exists between siblings is truly priceless, they reflect particles of your personality, making you realize to see the wit and humor you grew up with. All of my family was excited and happy to see me so happy and positive. I have been smiling and talking about hubby dear, all the good times we share and they are more than happy to listen to all the geeky stories I have to tell. :) According to my siblings, I have taken Azam's humor and laugh at things I never considered funny before. At times they think I am weird... haha I grant them their rightful observation. ;)

San Francisco is one of the places I really love. Walking down the streets and enjoying Italian food amongst great friends, was long overdue! Laughing, acting silly, taking pictures, noticing the attentive looks as we'd pass by, really felt young and refreshing!

2007, my seventh heaven. 2008, will surely be great!!! :)