Monday, December 3, 2007

Marital Bliss- Now “Mrs.” from “Miss.”

I have noticed a soft hue on me lately. This is a glow that I always wondered about and found on new mommies to be or people who’d be truly happy within their lives. Now that I am a newly wed myself, this glow hasn’t left my side and I wonder; it must be my inner happiness that is recognizable on my face, therefore the glow?

The beauty of marriage is leaving its fruits in many forms. By finding a true companion, a good friend and supporter, all the good things in me have multiplied in massive velocity. It is true what they say, a girl blossoms into a woman the moment she is loved and cherished for. This strong willed, independent girl before marriage never knew that a man’s loving touch and practical approach would change her world so drastically that she’d be a little afraid of all the newly added blessings in her life. The beauty of it all is the wait and anticipation for the right time, the right person for the marriage to become this spiritual bond that still leaves me in awe and I find myself flying in cloud nine.

The sky looks brighter, the birds seem chirpier and the winds bring soft music to my ears. The sight of him coming home still makes me want to take a quick glance at the mirror before I open the door. The presence of a man, this strong built, sometimes scruffy looking programmer I can call my own who is simply normal, maybe a bit sarcastic and distant to the rest of the world, but it is the key to his heart that I hold and know exactly when to open and close, ha ha!

A woman is an incredible species; she has insight and carries a lot of love to share. Not only does she take care and makes her family feel at home, she is also always eager to help and doesn’t think twice when happiness is at stake, she will make the necessary sacrifices to ‘glue’ all the pieces together. This can be achieved with support and I emphasize SUPPORT alone, from the man that is a driving force behind her super powers. Reaching for the stars seems attainable when your other half is there standing in admiration and applauding your every move. Also, becoming each other’s greatest critique is very important for future improvement. The art is the delivery of criticism however; one can not just rant away a negative speech and expect respect in return. Keeping in mind that you still respect the other, the one negative comment that is about to burst out, should be converted into a “caring comment”. Changing the tone of your voice and pointing out how much you care, makes a whole lot of difference in the result that follows.

The bonding between husband and wife grows stronger over the years, especially when raising a family and the challenges are put on parents to perform as a team…communication is the golden key.

I look forward to that day when the house is full of laughter and fun. Where I am making cupcakes with my tiny helpers and 'baking flour' is spilled on their hands and faces, with the incredible sense of joy that comes with it.

As for now, I am taking it all in...hence; ”Marital Bliss”. :)

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Domestic Coma - “A reeling, dark sleeping character”

I am trapped in the darkness of my consciousness. The walls are creeping on to me like a wave of boiling lava, but I don’t move. I let it all come down until it dissolves the every pore of my skin and a heap of debris is left with a slight hope of survival.

Before the 'dungeon darkness' hits, I am trying to give my beloved home one last look; the chique damask wallpaper I carefully handpicked during my long quest for interior perfection is haunting me as I slowly drift away into nothingness. The beautifully laid out Persian rug and the Moroccan lanterns majestically hanging from the ceiling, unwillingly make me look small and insignificant as I go by like a blow of dust.

What am I? A mere being whose oxygen to breathe is purely more of a burden than a necessity? My perfectly painted finger nails may hold a diamond set or two, but these impeccable looking hands have seen days of labor, that of trembling and sweating when life’s struggles crossed their path. My nails remained ‘undone’, until the very notion of manicure stroke as exciting up till now.

The unbearing pain is opening doors to my very naked soul, whose capture is released of all fears, tearing its skin apart, digging deep down into the reality of me. Maybe it’s trying to grasp some truth behind this cut-throat fa├žade?

I am unveiling myself to myself for the very first time. The dying fear of losing will not block me as I am in perfect harmony with my robotic actions;

From early awakenings in the morning to the washing of the dishes; throwing the every day waste is purposeful and in compliance of what I feel... empty.

Where’s life? I ask.

I am Home.