Wednesday, December 15, 2010

A Hallmark Moment

I confess:  I'm a card collector. I love all things stationary; notepads, ink pens, diaries, stickers etc,. You'll have to drag me out of the Hallmark store as I have a serious lingering problem in the colorful card isles that I slowly pace through, reading every written thought on beautifully designed paper made to entice you. I love the feel of a card that can say so much when you hold it in your hands, knowing that the sender has chosen it with caring thoughts to be delivered straight to the recipient's heart.

I love everything beautiful. Back in elementary school in Holland, my friend and classmate used to call me an 'ekster', which is Dutch for 'magpie' - the bird that likes to collect shiny things. My fascination for pretty things that were designed artistically would only grow stronger over the years. Call it romantic or artistic, but the feeling that comes with words on paper, takes my imagination back to an era where feathered ink pens and old, ruffled paper were the primary form of communication for relaying thoughts in a very 'Jane Austen-ish' way. 

My trip to Hallmark today resulted in a basket full of gift wrap and cards for different occasions to stock up on my collection or perhaps my appetite...? As I walked pass the various categories, listening to joyful Christmas music in the background, my eyes fixated on the perfect card. Why perfect you ask? Well, it fulfilled my current craving; the feeling of togetherness and bliss.

I opened the card and smiled. Oh, Hallmark, why must you say the words straight out of my heart? 

Friday, December 10, 2010

Festive Moods

It feels warm and cozy this time of the year when everyone gathers together with their loved ones and shares stories of the passing year. In Houston, the weather is not as winter wonderland-ish as you'd hope, but the atmosphere is certainly there. I see houses lit up for the holiday spirit and it brings a smile to my face. How beautiful the streets look and how magical the trees are dressed, draped in twinkling lights as if they've come alive. I drive through the old street of a neighborhood, the kind of which carries this old-vintage feeling of aristocratic brick houses and double door entrances. Snowfall is missing and it may be missing for the entire winter season. Last year I remember, we had just a little bit snowfall and the excitement of seeing snow was shown in everyone's faces. People went outside to throw snowballs at each other, co-workers took a break in the snow whilst gathered laughing and reminiscing, moms & dads dug up slays and rides from the garage for their kids to slide on, lovers walked the paths of temporary 'wonderland' and homeowners like us, grieved the death of our plants and vegetables. ( O Thee tomatoes! )

The 'wonderment' around us may be fictional but it has become a necessity for survival in the current situation we have found ourselves in. The recession has left us in deep troubles - whether it is the unemployment rate or the failures of Health Care, we cannot fool ourselves anymore. The Christmas Tree in Rockefeller Center, New York City will lit up like every year and so will the faces of many who are 'able' to enjoy, but those struggling, who can not afford or possibly be happy are the ones to face reality everyday. A Christmas tree or the jam packed discounted stores will not pay their bills. And if you are planning on purchasing items on your credit card and adding to your endless debt, please think again. Do yourself a favor; Do Not Buy!

If the holidays are ripping you off, because of the pressured feeling of "buying" then you must rethink and re-evaluate the true spirits of any festivity. I am sure hundreds and hundreds of  years ago, people who'd celebrate, did not rush off to the Malls to eventually elbow each other for that cashmere sweater or aggressively snag that one parking spot. 

Live people. Live to see and enjoy. Do not fall for materialism. It all comes and goes...
We take, we digest and we waste; the never-ending cycle.

Thursday, December 9, 2010


Since my last post, I have given birth to our precious little baby girl Mehreen on Friday, October 22nd at 2:43 PM in the afternoon. Not only was the (delivery) experience absolutely surreal, but I was also lucky to have had the positive and loving support around me from the hospital staff, the doctor and especially my husband. My angel was born and put onto my lap almost immediately. Our eyes met for the first time; we looked at each other and I cried out of joy. I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life. There she was. Our beautiful little girl...

Now, 6 weeks into Motherhood, I have snapped out of my 'surreality' and stepped into my 'reality' the moment I started nursing my baby. At the hospital, they really emphasize on breastfeeding which was absolutely fine with me as I was planning on doing so. But little did I know, that nursing would be so tiresome, especially since I'd just given birth! My baby was fed every two hours, 24/7. I would force myself to sit up right on the hospital bed and feed her. Of course most of it happened out of maternal instincts and the overwhelming desire to care for my baby - but the nurses at the hospital did push me a lot - perhaps in a good way. (?)

Luckily, my mom and sister arrived the same day she was born and after spending two nights at the hospital (which felt like a lifetime) I was finally going home with my sweet bundle of joy. Oh, how happy I was to arrive home - my home! My mom and sister immediately took over and I felt a sense of relief. At the hospital, my husband was amazing in taking care of everything. He would never flinch from his spousal & fatherly duties and would act right away. When I needed something, he'd be there like Superman and now that I think of it, I could've never done it without him. I realize how important it is to have a strong bond with your (life) partner since it all boils down to teamwork in life. Having a baby DOES change everything, but it changes for the better when you have the right, loving support by your side. My career in Motherhood is by far the most exhilarating, exhausting, rewarding and the most beautiful full-time job I've ever had. Being a stylist at a department store or earning the big bucks in Real Estate or trying to generate clients as a Marketing Exec. at a Financial Planning Firm, does not compare to this God given, priceless gift of 'offspring'.

In two weeks, Mehreen will be 2 months old. Time flies they say and it surely does! I feel in cloud nine, even though I am always sleep deprived; feeling like a zombie, going about my 'mommy chores' when daddy goes to work - but overall, we are incredibly blessed ("Mashallah/Knock on wood") and every day I look at her, kiss her tiny little toes and fingers, sing to her like an on-stage 'Glee' performance...and you know...she looks back at me, coos at me and probably thinks to herself; "MAMMA has gone CRAZY!"

Oh yes my dear, crazy for you...

Monday, October 18, 2010


The time has finally arrived; I will be becoming a mommy soon. It feels surreal and kind of incredible - almost as if I am talking about someone else, but reality is that I am carrying a baby that is soon to be delivered to this world on Friday, Oct. 22nd via induction or perhaps earlier if the baby decided to make an entry in the world all by itself. :)

I have gotten used to my big belly getting in my way and the inconvenience of not seeing my toes, which by the way, perfectly shows since applying nail polish on toe nails is like going into battle with my belly! The maneuvering part really catches me off guard and for that moment I realize that some things are better left undone and so I concur. Yesterday, I was trying to put a pair of socks on and parked myself on the edge of the bed, ready to dress my feet with the soft embrace of fabric - I horribly failed and called mr. hubby to help me out. He was sweet to grab each sock and put it on my feet which  left me with a rush of affection and adoring love for the man who has vowed to share his life with me and will soon become the father of my child. I looked at him and said; "This may be a fast-forward scene of how we will be in old age". 

I feel bittersweet about my pregnancy and the cross-over of bringing my child into this life - almost as if I'm leaving behind one responsibility of being a 'carrier' to accepting an ever bigger responsibility of becoming a 'mother'. With the grace of God, my pregnancy has been very enjoyable and I honestly have nothing to complain about. I feel so grateful for all the blessings God has bestowed upon us and I continue to praise Him for everything he has granted to  shower us with.

I strongly believe in having a positive attitude. One should smile, don't you think? I encounter people who do not smile and represent their miseries in life as a display for other people to judge on. I always ponder and ask; why would they do that? Why would you not put your best face up in society, regardless of all the problems, complexities you may be facing...? There is no point in attracting bad 'vibes' from those who pretend to be sympathetic, but in the meanwhile enjoy the ego-boost of your negativity. That is why I make a conscious effort to smile and be kind and in return 'enjoying life', becomes easier and not that much of a drag at times. Believe me, it works.

My child will be of "loving nature" as we have chosen the name for our baby - the meaning itself was a no-brainer and I immediately knew that I wanted my child to be of loving nature and exceed the purpose of his/her name beyond any expectations.

I am certain my Baby will...

Sunday, October 17, 2010

A New Look, A New Beginning!

Dear Readers,

This is my official comeback to the Blog World which I have ignored for quite a while now. I was confused as to where to put my thoughts and frankly, you seemed a little outdated to me so I started looking for different outlets to express myself. I must confess and humbly say, that I was wrong to "explore" my options and that you were and are loyal to me as the day I began to write on here.

A lot has changed since my last post; Yes, I am still pregnant, but we are counting down the days and the baby can come anytime now!
Another change, which you probably have noticed, and if not, it is okay - I have changed my template to a more suitable and tasteful layout which I personally find very appealing and I certainly hope you will too. My aim is to write on a regular basis and carve out a beautiful journey with you that we can both delve into, feel happy or sad about and learn from one and other. So, what do you say - are you in?

I am in a very happy place in my life which is not to say that 'happiness' per se, has come easy. On the contrary; I've had my share of challenges, tragic episodes and a lot of hard work to have created the 'Naila' I am now. Of course, it is needless to say that without my faith in God and love for mankind that has been instilled by my parents, I would never have been the person I am today and full credit belongs to them and my Creator. This Blog will host my feelings, my thoughts and how I look upon life on a daily basis. The topics can vary as every day varies from the days before, unlike Groundhog Day! (yes, my attempt to crack a joke - ha ha?). I am excited to step into motherhood and share my experiences with you and along the way, who knows, we might turn out to be each other's best friends! ;)

Stay patient with me as I have a lot to say, but also encourage me to become better, will ya? I would really appreciate your support 'Dear Diary' and my very dear readers. Here's a short text that I have posted on my FB wall and I'd love to share on this post:

"The dreams & hopes that shatter in front of our eyes, 
aren't necessarily destructive to our lives. What is, is to allow destruction to take over our dreams, our willingness to become better, stronger and greater. 
Fate. Destiny.

What is your take?"